7 Year Old Behavior As Explained by a Play Therapist
Takeaway: Along with many other things you aren’t told before becoming a parent, dealing with new changes every year as your child gets older isn’t one of them — especially if your child starts to display challenging behaviors. In this blog, we’ll walk through what to expect from your seven year old, what to watch out for, and when you need to talk to a professional.
As a parent, watching your child grow up is a bittersweet experience.
On one hand, you love this stage of your child’s life because they’re still young enough to enjoy “little kid stuff,” but they’re big enough to start handling tasks by themselves.
They’re becoming more independent and social, but that doesn’t mean they won’t still need their parent or caregiver to help them. You’re still their most important guide and support, so take time to enjoy their middle childhood while it lasts.
But what distinguishes 7-year-old behavior from other ages? How does it differ from a six-year-old’s behavior?
In this blog, I’ll answer those questions (and more). Let’s look at some milestones and behaviors you may notice at this point in your child’s development.
What to Expect: Normal 7 Year Old Behavior
Since they’re entering the second year of middle childhood, you might not think there’s a major behavior shift in your child’s behavior from ages six to seven. However, just because a child is still in a certain age group doesn’t mean their behaviors won’t evolve.
Refer to my guide on six-year-old behavior to see how they differ from what you can expect from your child's behavior or other children.
From physical skills to improved cognitive ability to physical play, a child will grow tremendously during their seventh year. If you have any concerns about their overall health, we encourage you to follow up with your child's pediatrician or an adolescent psychiatry professional.
Dressing Independently
By age seven, your child will likely start developing their own preferences for colors and patterns. They may enjoy selecting their clothes and experimenting with different styles, reflecting their newfound individuality.
As they gain confidence in themselves, they’ll also sharpen their fine motor skills by learning to fasten buttons, tie shoelaces, and zip up jackets.
With these skills, however, comes frustration for some children. They may become overstimulated quickly when making outfit choices or resist help as they learn to dress themselves.
Increased Cognitive Skills
Children at this age typically experience significant growth in their cognitive abilities, notably improvements in memory, attention, and problem-solving skills.
These improved abilities help children further explore their world, take the initiative to analyze situations more logically, and make informed decisions based on evidence and reasoning — but this doesn’t mean these skills are fully developed.
Your child is still a child, so they will need assistance to become a more independent learner. Every child’s cognition develops at a different speed, so while some meet developmental milestones early, others may struggle.
Kids who have difficulty reading are more common now than in the past, but for the most part, you can expect your child to read independently by this developmental stage.
Increased Awareness of Their Body and Mind
A defining feature of turning seven is that children learn more about their bodies, gaining a greater awareness of their body parts and how they work.
You may notice they complain more about stomachaches or headaches and take a more realistic view of pain.
It's important, especially if there are younger children in the house, to teach them age appropriate ways to explore their body.
Growing Interest in Learning
Seven-year-olds often demonstrate curiosity and a thirst for knowledge, actively seeking new information and experiences to satisfy their growing intellectual interests.
Kids also put this new knowledge to use as they become more familiar with various subjects, like math, science, and language arts. Their expanding vocabulary allows them to better express themselves and clearly articulate their thoughts and ideas.
Better Comprehension
Along with a greater interest in learning, kids also become better at comprehending and retaining what they absorb.
Whether it’s helpful advice from their parents or the occasional cuss word they heard on the bus, your child’s brain is still very much like a sponge at this stage of development -- especially at school.
They can follow higher-level materials and identify key details, themes, and main ideas within whatever they’re reading.
Acting Out in the Classroom
Communicate regularly with your child’s teachers to get a helpful report on their behavior patterns at school.
Since you’re not there, they may act differently than they do at school.
Behavior problems in school at this age aren’t uncommon and aren’t necessarily a warning sign that something worse is brewing under the surface.
Parenting Tips for 7 Year Old Children
Here are some of my favorite parenting tips to help you navigate your seven-year-old’s changes in development.
Boost Self-Esteem
Kids have big emotions, especially when moving from kindergarten to the first or second grade.
Given this and the fact that one in every four kids reports being bullied during the school year, it’s vital to boost your child’s self-esteem as they advance in development.
Create a supportive and nurturing environment at home where they feel safe to express themselves and take risks without fear of judgment or criticism. You can also set achievable goals and encourage your child as they work towards them.
When your child succeeds, no matter the context, it boosts their self confidence and encourages them to face challenges with enthusiasm and determination.
Have the Difficult Conversations
Divorce, death, and delays are just a few of the many things that are difficult to talk about with school age children.
Although they have a deeper understanding of their environment, friends, and family, they aren’t as capable of breaking down reality as adults.
That’s why openly talking about tough topics is so important; it teaches them to approach conflict or taboo situations with less anxiety.
This helps them learn to regulate their emotions and use their newly discovered problem-solving skills. They also develop empathy and understanding of different perspectives.
Establish Routines and Structure
Every child learns differently, so it’s important to create structure and routines that align with how your child processes the world around them—especially if your child is neurodivergent.
Children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism, or obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) may have specific needs, like more reminders to complete tasks or projects and simplified routines for household chores.
On a more general scale, establishing consistent routines, clear expectations, and age appropriate boundaries are all ways to start adding more structure to your family. Plus, adding healthy lifestyle choices to family's life isn't ever a bad idea.
Monitor Screen Time
While educational apps, games, and other online resources can promote critical thinking and help students expand their knowledge in various subjects and allow them to spend time with friends online, they can also heavily affect their mental health.
Exposure to social media and online communities also potentially increases students' exposure to inappropriate language and internet predators.
To combat this, you can establish clear rules about when and how much screen time is allowed, prioritizing activities that promote physical activity and family time. Also, when they do access screens, make sure they’re watching only high quality sources of entertainment.
When It’s Time to Talk to Mental Health Professionals
Even if you’re one of the most patient and understanding parents in your social circle, it’s tough to deal with how quickly your child’s mind and brain develop at this age. How do you know when it’s time to talk to a mental health professional?
Although every child is different, if you notice your child is having more severe tantrums and extreme mood swings or has obvious developmental delays, it’s a clear sign you need to seek help.
However, not all warning signs are identifiable to most parents, so leaning on your resources is vital when your child is this age. It takes a village to raise a child, but if you don’t have family nearby or a strong support system, working with a therapist who values holistic approaches to improving mental health is an effective alternative.
At Rooted Rhythm Therapy, we’re here to support you through this stage of parenthood. We’re well-versed in the challenges you may experience and have the expertise to help you address the red flags during this development stage. We would love to hear your story and see if our services fit your needs.
Schedule a consultation with one of our therapists to learn more.